You might have studied so many propounded theories that humans’ needs are unlimited, and that, the more we get, the more we purge blood and sweat to get more and more.
Better, still, you know this for a fact, because you are human too and you realize always that, nothing seems to give you absolute pleasure, comfort or happiness. Nothing really makes you happy, at least not for long, no matter how many or how much you toil to amass _Yes, nothing would make you absolutely happy, because deep within your heart, is an obscured being who is always unhappy, until you learn its ways_
At least if you have a physical problem, that you are able to identify, you would do your best to solve them. Unlike physical problems, the “sad man” is nowhere to be found in our heart. No matter how happy you become, it remains sad. “As you feed your heart with happiness, it starves, because it doesn’t allow the food of happiness to reach it – that is its intrinsic make-up; It is always sad. For instance, you want the most delicious food to eat. You get it, finish it, and yet you are marginally happy. You don’t really feel happy afterall. Again, you work hard for a particular spouse and after you get them, and probably get the best of them, your candle of happiness dims and you are no longer really enthused about them or everything. You even ask yourself, ” Now I have him or her, what else? Same could be said about things. All these are because of “the sad man” embedded deep within your heart and sadly nowhere to be found. If care is not taken, you can never be happy or content with anything no matter how precise, or no matter the quantity you get of what you wanted.
How then can you find and feed the sad man with some dose of happiness?
The puzzle is, how can you deal with something you can’t find or see?
Ignoring or pretending it is not present isn’t the best option. Why? Because it will sadden you anyway, at least in the long run.
This is what you can do.
Psychologically, the more we shrink back from pain or discomfort, the more severe it becomes on us. Conversely, the more we accept and endure pain, the easier we swim in it.
*For instance, if it is raining and you don’t get severely troubled by it and even strip your clothes and bathe in it, would the rain matter or be a worry to you? No. Why? Because you are happy with the discomfort and even bathing in it regardless.*
_So is the sad man. It should be left to be sad, while we rejoice in it_. What it means is that, we can’t fight him, we just allow it to be there in our heart, while we still enjoy it. If it becomes sad, be happy still with what you desired for or worked hard for. _Treat it as somewhat a deception, rather than non-existent._ Accept it while you still be happy.
*_Contentment is just a little aspect of appeasing the sad man per this discussion. Why? Because contentment can prove itself to be a form of consideration, while suffering lingers, it’s a variable; a fickle, and not organized enough to withstand the operations of the sad man._*
Beyond contentment, the total recognition and acceptance of the sad man anyway, in times of happiness just like dancing in the rain and enjoying regardless, is what can compensate the sad man for as long as possible. The longevity of our acceptance of him is the tragedy, so, the sad man remains a puzzle and a sorrow in our hearts.
Mr. Hko (Writer and Coach)
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