Well, there is a difference between Listening and Hearing and it is extremely important that we understand the meaning of the two, so that we could avoid conflicts in our relationship and strengthen respect and trust between our partners and us. Listening is of the view to understand and perhaps act upon what (could be an information or report) you received during discussions, while Hearing is just using the ear to receive an information without paying particular attention to what is being said.
Do you often ask your partner to repeat what she said two years ago? Or do you act in a way contrary to a discussion you had with her? Or do you ask too many questions about talks you had about a decision or her problems. If your answers are Yes, then you weren’t listening, you just were Hearing what ever she had to say.
This reduces the confidence and trust your partner has in you and it might even result in disrespect, because you are unreliable.
Women have so many needs and most of them are solved just by Listening, nothing else Yes, Just that!
You need not to be quick in finding solutions to the problems your dates or your wife put before you. They just need a person to talk to and not solutions. So you see why listening abilities are a must in every successful relationship?
If you wish to change the way your wife perceives you, increase her sexual satisfaction, and become in her mind the best man on earth, listen to her.
That means that you do not interrupt her with your stories, your thoughts on what she just said, or by changing the subject. Listen to her heart as well as her words. As she talks, ask yourself, “What is she feeling as she tells me this?” Even more importantly, ask yourself, “What is the message she really wants me to hear?” Once she knows that you are genuinely interested in her views, thoughts, and feelings, you can actually ask her those questions. However, do NOT ask them until you know that she knows that you are trying to understand her, not correct her or necessarily bring out solutions to prove you are a man and knows all.
This one thing can change you into a better husband or partner in one month: Each day, spend at least a half-hour just listening to your wife talk. Turn off the TV, cellphones, and radios. Find a place where there are no distractions, including interruptions from your children (if you have). Look directly into her eyes, and then ask a couple of questions to get her started. Comment only if she asks, or if you want to better understand something she just said. Show her that you enjoy hearing her talk, no matter how trivial (unimportant) the subject, because it helps you understand her better and love her more. Use facial expressions to show you really follow and empathize with what she is saying. You could tap her shoulders or hug her to show how you really care about what she is saying whiles she speaks. Intermittently, you could repeat things she says, nod or add up to complete statements she tries to make to let her know you are really attentive and following everything she says.
Improve your Relationship or Marriage today by Listening more and talking less!
Mr. Hko (Grammarian, Counselor)
The Life - Mr. Hko 